Oh God, rescue this weary heart.
That you would quench this ever deepening thirst.
Oh that you would hear the cry that echoes through my whole being.
I know I can’t continue on this road.
You’ve asked me to keep on going but I’ve got no more to give.
I’ve reached the end of my understanding.
And yet you keep me on the verge of my breaking point as you continue to add pressure.
God I’ve truly got nothing left.
on bended knee,
crying out on your behalf,
for the pain
that i know
sharing your burden as best I can
praying, pleading, desperately seeking
for you to find relief…
i know of
God – help my dear friend
Why do you love me like you do?
Take me into your arms and reassure my anxious heart.
Why do you want me?
Have you seen all that I’ve done??
I don’t deserve your love nor your affection.
I don’t deserve you at all.
Yet I hear you gently whispering
Come to me beloved
rest your weary head against me
listen to the song I sing over you
my love sees the truth of you
and its okay.
You’re not perfect, I know
but I love you anyways
I know your past, but I know your future too.
I see you and I smile, for I love who you’re becoming.
I know you will come to love you too.
i’ve been slowly giving up
just ever so subtly
so no one else would notice,
until it was too late
distracting others with my sleight of hand
is my specialty
to keep them from seeing my brokenness
at least most of it
but my voice
always seems to give me away
i can’t hide the defeat
not anymore, at least
honestly i have tried
to move beyond this wall
to press on
struggle against my weaknesses
but in truth i’ve failed
so, here i stand
realizing all at once
that when i spoke to the wall to crumble
You crumbled me
so, what do we do with these pieces?
loneliness peels away the layers of my facade
showing the truth of me
i am broken
in desperate need of saving
my voice reveals the defeat of my heart
i try to put on a brave face
try to hide the fact that i’m drowning
into this abyss of pain
i avoid eye contact
for dread that you
will see the fear
i wander off
alone in the kitchen
holding back tears
as i try to make some sense out of –
but to no avail
is tearing me apart
shred by shred
piece by painful piece
i judge books by their covers
people by the things unsaid,
hidden behind the tears in their eyes
i give money freely
but my time reservedly
knowing which is of true value
i listen expectantly
i quietly observe
hearing silent requests
not reading minds, but seeing hearts
i live life as if today is my last
not for morbidity
but for love
i have learned
in overwhelming tones
that love is the whole point
Sometimes my fortress of solitude
seems more like a prison.
Where heavy burdens are laid,
upon this ever weakening frame.
I stagger and begin to crumple
under this new weight.
Struggling to not be overcome
I eventually find myself standing erect,
This fortress may be my prison,
but every time it breaks me –
it strengthens in the same moment.
Is it a prison?
Or my place of freedom?